Nak balik rumah.


Assalamualaikum.
"helo people.
people of the world...
and i can be honest that..
i just wanna go homee...."
*singing randomly



i wanna go home.
seriously even though my body is still in utp, obviously lah kan.
cause next week still i got class until thursday.
tapi sekarang ni jiwa dan raga, dan semangat batin dalaman semua dah ada kat rumah dah..
dah tak dapat diselamatkan lagi.
i've bought 2 more novels to read.
menunjukkan yang betapa nisa takkan belajar sepanjang minggu depan sebab otak dah berhenti berfungsi.
hahaha alasan.







by the way, saya ada beberapa perutusan nak dibuat hari ni.
hehehe.
walaupun takde kaitan dengan kalian semua sekalian alam.
but i think it's worth to share what i think.
cause i seems to think quite harshly these few days,,
dah tak selembik dulu.
wonder why..hm.



to my old friend whom i've been mad with :
sorry..
bukan aku marah kau.
bukan aku taknak maafkan kau.
aku bukan sesiapa nak hukum kau, yang mungkin kau buat bukan dengan kerelaan kau pun.
aku marah, mungkin sebab benda kecil je.
aku pun tak tahu apa masalah kau sebenarnya kan.
so it's okay, cukup lah kau tahu, aku dah tak marah kau.
aku maafkan kau.
cuma things has been hard for me..so perhaps we should just stay away from each other..
bukan sengaja aku ignore kau, aku stay away from kau.
but aku marah, aku taknak berkasar.
aku taknak panas hati aku buat aku buat benda salah.
but now aku dah redha, aku tak marah kau..
aku maafkan kau.
cuma satu aku nak kau fikir semula..
Allah takkan uji hambaNya dengan sesuatu ujian yang dia tahu hambaNya takkan mampu kan.
kau lebih maklum dari aku, so sabar.
berfikir sebelum kau bertindak..jangan buat benda yang pelik pelik..
yang kau tahu orang takkan terima dan akan menyakitkan kau.
wanita ni bukan untuk dijadikan teman sampai kau jumpa apa yang kau nak..
dia bukan bitch, she's a woman.
if you want her, simpan niat untuk marry her, she's a human being.
yes, i know the story..aku tak marah, cuma berkata kata sebab dua dua kawan aku.
aku tak tahu apa jadi dengan hidup kau, but yeah.
kau tetap kawan aku, cuma mungkin kita takkan dapat jadi serapat dulu.
i'm sorry.



to lelaki kesayangan saya :
hey awak.
sorry i haven't been talking to you these days.
i don't feel like talking to the world,,
i feel like shutting my doors and windows from every single llife that exist.
i just wanna be alone, cause i feel frustrated.
i've been trying to make things work out between us since the day we fall for each other.
i'm going to be 20 next year, i'm going to be a woman dah awak :)
and i want to be a woman behind all your success, a woman of your strength.
but lately i feel like i've been thinking too much about all of those.
perhaps you're too busy to ask what am i doing, how's my Ramadan today.
i feel alone, i feel ignored.
i feel like it was unlikely to be happen, so i was sad.
huge burden.
but dugaan saya kalau banding dengan yang kat Gaza or MH17, theirs are unbearable.
i've got nothing to ask you.
taknak minta baju raya 2 3 ratus per piece, or neelofalens yang mahal kebaboom..
kuih raya or duit raya, no.
just wanted to ask for you..to stay here.
by my side, like you always said you would be.
i may not be a beautiful queen, i'm so sorry.
but i'll be the best woman in the world you could ever fall for.
saya takut kalau kalau saya pergi, far, and tak dapat balik lagi.
so i want you to know.
you're still my one and only sunshine, and always going to be my one and only.
it's just that saya cuba nak rasa yakin yang awak nak saya, like dulu.
i'm sorry.



okay dah..done. :)
happy akhir Ramadan semua.
jangan pernah berhenti panjangkan doa kita pada saudara Ilam di Gaza.
jangan teralih pandangan kita untuk mendoakan kesejahteraan mereka.
jangan juga lupa pada MH17.
al-fatihah untuk mereka.
such a tragic year.
teruskan berdoa.
teruskan.
jangan pernah berhenti untuk kedua-duanya.
never.






nak balik.



2 comments:

  1. Selamat hari raya . Eh awal lagi .hehehe
    Minta maaf ya kalau ada salah silap =)

    ReplyDelete

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